Our staycation involved a lot more STAY and a lot less vacation. I've concluded that vacationing with very young children is different from vacationing. We quickly realized that the things David and I wanted to do would not be doable given our daughters' ages. Hiking mountains and robbing banks would just have to wait until the children move out of the house. We had to re-plan, and all plans would have to happen in the morning since the toddler naps from 1pm-4pm.
That would have been a photo of Wheeler Farm. The toddler began the day by puking 3 or 4 times in the morning. You'd think that would teach her to not drink from baby bottles that had rolled under a chair and been lost a day or two after being used.
So, we did laundry.
We did manage to still enjoy a steak and salmon dinner at a neighbor's house and a street party BBQ at another neighbor's home. Here, BabyDhis enjoyed a bouquet of rowdy balloons from a safe distance.
This would have been a photo of Bridal Veil Falls, where we had planned to go on a leisurely hike.
The toddler puked an extra couple times in the morning, so we got a late start on our day. She was also still extremely cranky, and by the time we got to the area, the rain was pouring down. We drove past the falls while the toddler slept in the car seat. We spent $50 of our staycation money on an unplanned lunch on the road. Baby Dhis ate none of her portion and instead decided to throw things at the table.
The City Library-- We finally did go somewhere. Of course, it would be the exotic library. In the 6 years we have lived here, we had never been to our library. David fell in love with it and decided that would be one of the destinations for future daddy-daughter dates.
The Farm at Thanksgiving Point-- Most of our time there was spent convincing Baby Dhis to look at the animals from a close proximity.
Here, I have convinced her for about a minute that the cow is at a safe distance.
And then it bit her hand off.
OK, not really, but that would have totally happened if it had been a Saturday Night Live skit.
Dhis would not even touch the fake cow in the lobby. David was POSITIVE the best therapy would be for her to "just get over it." And by "over it," he meant, swoop her up and force her to sit on top of the fiberglass bovine. Screaming ensued.
In true vacation form, I lost my cell phone. If you've ever lost your cell phone, then you know the gut-kick it is. Add to it that I had just bought it two weeks prior and you can multiply that angering, helpless feeling by kazillion. (I'll wait while you get your calculator.)
I only realized the loss after Thanksgiving Point office hours, but I left a voicemail message and emailed the department head over animals. (The Animal Head?) Twenty minutes later, I got a call that my phone had been located. Hooray! I had only to go down and retrieve it from the belly of a goat.
At home, we set up a new kiddie pool for Dhis. She has never been in a pool. She loved it about as much as she loved the fake cow.
That would have been a photo of Temple Square.
Toddler was still recovering from the puking, the cow, and the pool. Mommy was grumpy. Daddy was tired. Baby was cute.
We stayed home.
Discovery Gateway-- I had never been to the children's museum and thought it would be like the museum I visited in St Louis, which was huge and cool and awesome for all ages.
Holy overpriced-underwhelmedness! Admission is $8.50 per person over the age of 1! Why on earth do they charge adults $8.50 to enter when there is absolutely nothing they can enjoy doing there except watch their kids play with germy toys?? There were seriously dozens and dozens of parents just sitting on benches watching their kids play with toys they already have at home. David's admission fee covered him standing next to the stroller with Maya. Because we can't do that at home. For free. I guess.
Well, as with regular vacations, sometimes you go to expensive places you would never go to if you knew better. There were some cool things there, but Dhis could barely get in to play with them because other kids had taken off with the supplies and the teenage employees paid to recover them were busy playing with one of the displays instead.
Dhis did in fact discover a few things, which led us to discover what socially-neglectful parents we are.
You know these ride-on toys?
Yeah. My child? Never been on one. Here she is trying to get on it by backing up to it. She rode on this and another one for eight dollars. I mean, eight hours.
Here, a colander.
And because we like to torture her so, David put her on a fake horse against her will. Notice the glee and anticipation in the daddy's face?
The daughter loved it as much as she loves fake cows and kiddie pools.
That would have been a photo of us at the Ward Campout roasting marshmallows and singing a rousing round of "Little Pioneer Children." But we had had enough of our staycation with little kids and needed a regular stay at home to recover from our, um, staying.
We SO need a vacation from our staycation. Maybe when the last kid leaves for college. Dear, sweet, distant college.